Gooch Juice

Ingredients:

Preparation:

Mix applekorn, dirt, and baby wipes. Bake at 102° in a New Mexican oven. Simmer for 14 hours. When a delicate crust has formed on pants Gooch Juice is done.

Effects:

Pumps become effective when coated with Gooch Juice. High tech guns, though ineffective, work much more efficiently and reliably when coated with Gooch Juice. Skill levels never below mediocre.

Warnings:

Bodily fluids will seep from many orifices. Smells like MAN!