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Recipes
From Talula |
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The Butcher |
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| Ingredients: | 1 Butter Bean body cast |
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| Preparation: | Mix cigars, credit card debt, automags, fat trimmings and rubber extract in extra large vat. Add bourbon to taste and light on fire. Wait for everything to melt down and stir until smooth. Pour mixture into cast and place in large meat cooler. When fully cooled remove suit from cast and apply to body. | |||
| Effects: | When wearing the Butcher suit, paintballs will only break on joints such as elbows and knees. You will take more bounces than you thought possible. Rate of fire increases greatly as well as paint consumption. Little kids will look to you for guidance on the field and you WILL send them ahead as scouts, sacrifices, and other forms of fodder. (Mobile landmine detectors.) The suit will greatly inhibit mobility. You must stand at all times. You will be limited to one exciting move per day of use. Exciting moves include running. This will cause you to play in the back bunkers and move up only as far as your teammates allow. Due to credit cards in mixture, money will always be available. | |||
| Warnings: | The Butcher suit may cause arthritis, fatigue, liver failure, cancer and birth defects in pregnant women. Your debt to income ratio will double and you will receive calls from debt collectors daily. Little kids will first look up to you, then grow to despise you. |
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